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Going out and meeting people, are always fun to have, till they start telling me how I should live my WHOLE life.
"Only have
ONE kid?
WHEN are you gonna get pregnant again? Why
NOT?"
"Your son
NEEDS siblings. Oh, you're such a selfish
SELFISH person."
"Lemme guess, you don't wanna get pregnant, because you love your body too much. How can you be a
GOOD mom to your son?"
"You
SHOULD have another baby, it's
GOOD for you and your son."
"Think again. Reconsider. Someday, you
WILL regret not having more babies."
"You really don't have any idea what you're
MISSING in your life."
"You've got a baby boy. Now go
HAVE a baby girl."
Pregnancy, unlike fashion, is
NOT a trend (I don't need to have what they have, in order to be accepted by the society),
nor collecting babies' genders (I don't need to add a baby girl in my life just so I could have a "complete" family, my family is complete on the day Lex was born),
nor a competition about how many kids people could have in a lifetime (having many kids in life won't make anyone a better parent, though it's a proof that they do have good timing in having sex without being caught butt-naked by their kids).
Whenever one of them is adding one more baby in the family, I'm always so happy for the happy couple. I wish them well.
But most of them are not happy for me (the one who is too content with her life with just one child). So there they go again, telling me those lines above, and lecture me for an hour or two about how important it is to breed like them.
Whenever talking about kids, they keep on giving so much pressure, so others would go follow their path : having more babies.
Though they can't help complaining that they NEVER have enough time for themselves because they have to take care of so many kids in the house. How costly the school tuition for each kid is. And whenever they decided to take the whole family for a day out, they'd be so exhausted at the end of the day, because they have to cater each of their troops' needs and wants, all the time, till they reached home.
And that's the life they're telling everyone to have? Come on, get REAL!!
From my point of view, this annoying ancient behavior of theirs, is usually all about :
1. Bragging
That they could handle more than 1 kid, while juggling with their own wants+needs+lives (if they still have any), works, families, and in-laws' matters, and could still manage so hard to stay sane in the process. I call it The Super Mom Syndrome. When they talk, they brag about who is the most busiest of all.
2. Clustered companionship
Birds with the same feathers, flock together.
Whether they realize it or not, they tend to get closer with people who share the same amount of kids (because of the same stress level, and tiredness). One of their fave lines is : "Congrats on your 2nd child. When will the 3rd be here? Better make it fast. Breed more while still young. And raise them all together. So the exhaustion is simply once and for all. And you're done with them."
3. Good investment
They have this strong assumption : "More children = More people will take care of us in our old age". Well, in that case, I wish them the best luck of all.
There are some particular times I have a good feeling that they envy me.
I have a son, Lex. I love him with all my heart. To me (and everyone who ever met him) he's so adorable, kind, gentle, polite, and very easy to love. I enjoy being his mother, taking care of him, play with him, teach him new things in life, and building a good strong+reliable relationship with him.
And because Lex is always so easy to take care about (his independency+maturity level is way above his age), I can enjoy my life to the fullest. I go to the gym three times a week. Pamper myself at my fave beauty salon. Meeting friends/relatives. Go shopping. Late night movies with beloved hubby at the mall, also lunch/dinner with him at some fancy restaurants (on our special events). And if I'm just staying at home, on my ME-time I can go online, read books, crocheting, planning things ahead, etc. I usually enjoy my ME-time with Lex playing around me, so I can kiss+hug him anytime I want.
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Me and my son Lex.
The love of my life. The source of my daily happiness. The light of my heart. |
Maybe because I can have enough time for myself, I can really enjoy my time with Lex. I often miss him so much when I'm not with him, so I do things more efficiently out there, and go back being with him at home as soon as possible.
Some friends told me, I love my son in a very lovely way (one of them got so inspired, he wants to start a family soon with his fiancee). They said, the way I enjoy being Lex's mother is what so interested to them.
I love my family so much.
I've lost my big brother in a hit-and-run car accident on July 14, 1989. It was around 11 AM on a hot sunny day. He was biking to school (to encourage me on my first day at junior high school), when a drunk driver hit the bicycle from behind, threw my brother into the air, and on the way down, hit the sharp edge of the pavement with his head first. He had internal bleeding, and went into a coma for 2 hours, before the doc came and announced his time of death. His body was still so warm at that time. I was there holding his head.
I was 12 years old. He was just a year older than me. Died with a little smile on his face.
My closest best friend on this planet, gone too soon.
And that's why I love my family so passionately. I show them how much I love them. I tell them how much I love them. Everyday. Just to remind them, in bad times/days, whatever happened, I love them always.
I don't know when they're gonna leave me for good.
If tomorrow never comes, I don't want them leaving without knowing how much they mean to me.
When I build a family of my own, I don't do that to impress anyone, let alone to brag about it.
I feel so content having Lex and hubby in my life.
I don't need to get pregnant and have more babies, just for the sake of fulfilling other people's fake happiness.
This is NOT high school anymore.
It's my life. My family. My household. And I run it as I see fit.
